DOORS
Once there were knocks on doors
and women used to open them
life used to pass by
dusted and polished each day
Those who
longed for a great love
so as to watch their own beauty
through the centuries
to be frozen like a painting was their desire
From little girls
they grew up like docile saplings
and wearing glittering wedding rings on their fingers
entered prisons
like white doves
Some took to the streets
not even becoming mothers
some became falling stars and disappeared
some hang themselves on a rosebush
waiting for life without a question
The window sparkled
the washing ironed
but never a knock on the door
the man who would love madly
never arrived
The world was a horse carriage
and women pulled it at top speed
how could they not understand
that a woman was the strongest
and the word freedom
was like a new year's eve party in the sky
they should never find the right dress
they could never go
They were just surprised
at the men's soldier-dress
and for the midnight watches
they knitted sweaters
to be worn secretly under uniforms
Life knitted by pain with fine needles
wounded by bullet holes
their dowries trampled upon without pity
every time man massacred man
they lost those most cherished husbands and sons
Tears and loneliness burnt in candles
incense burners smoked
in cold widow rooms
Their photographs were on the walls
the sons, husbands and in the hands of guns
the thick eye brows, hard looks, thick moustaches
ruled their homes
Interfering with everything from where they were
from the door knocker to the food in the pan
their shouts still ringing all around
while children like kittens hid behind their mothers' skirts
They prayed and prayed
and carried myrtle branches
to the graves on every festive day
longing was lived with imperceptible pain
silently descending
from the heart to the groin
Once there were knocks on the doors
and women used to open them
life used to pass by
dusted and polished each day.
(1986)
UNSENT LETTERS
X
No permission to cross
in reality it is the traces of hope which disappear
days spent in longing have turned to grief
Don’t wait for me
in the other cell of sorrow
No access to love
(Our Army is our greatest security)
I kept looking at the stars tonight
hoping you were looking too
Your message for a meeting has reached me
in a different country
at a different time
But I can’t wait
the yellow snake called time
keeps writhing inside me
I have fallen into unpostponable longings
I must see you today
I will tell everyone I am in love with you
even the policeman at the check-point
I will tell everyone your forbidden name
I will then walk through
dressed like a cat
Wait for me
take me in your arms
I will say “miow” to you in Turkish.
